This blog is a place where you and your fellow ENG101 classmates can share your work. Feel free to post any of your brainstorm ideas or your essay drafts - anything from your first to final drafts. Pay attention to each other, make thoughtful contributions, ask plenty of questions, and most importantly, enjoy each other!
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
RL #8 Personal Response to Composition: Fisher & Sanders
Post here too. Pay attention to what your classmates have written. If someone makes an observation that is similar to yours, address that in your post.
I liked Ms.Fisher's essay because reading it brought memories from my childhood. The phrase "With us, for the first years of my life, there was a series, every summer of short, but violently active cannings. It was the same in my house. The essay by Mr.Sanders was sad but good. I liked it. I never knew what buckeyes was until reading this essay. i liked the flow and the way he shared the memories of his father.
“The Measure of My Powers” There was a few different details that made this essay unique. The composition of the essay is very on-topic. I also thought it was interesting that more than one paragraph in her essay is just one huge run-on sentence. Most authors would lose their audience in huge run-ons, but she was able to make it work without confusing the essay too much.
“Buckeye” The composition of this essay was that of a very descriptive essay. I don’t see a lot of special differences from most generic essays, other than the richness of the descriptions. The entire essay was very clear and I was not confused at any point, which makes for a great essay.
There was nothing all too special about the composition itself; once the story got started it was like any other essay. However I do enjoy the little preface. Though Sander’s content flattered me more than Fisher’s, I have to say his composition was close to that of Fisher’s. It felt like any old essay, very simple, no complexity whatsoever. -Patricia
Fisher’s “The Measure of my Powers” is written with a four year old perspective. It’s simple and short, almost too short because when it was done I wanted to read more of her life and thoughts. She uses description but only when it was necessary. She doesn’t waste time trying to make her sentences fancy and drawn out. For example Fisher writes, “With us, for the first years of my life, there was a series, every summer, of short but violent active cannings” (296). From this sentence we understand that every summer they can fruit; simple. Yet, from the few words of description she uses we also realize that the canning sessions are quick and intense. I also appreciated her flow amongst paragraphs; it was not choppy even though the essay itself was short.
On the other hand, “Buckeye” was extremely choppy. For example, Sanders talks about Buckeyes being poisonous and how nobody was stupid enough to eat them. Following that Sanders says, “I knew the gaze of deer from living in the Ravenna Arsenal, in Portage County, up in the northeastern corner of Ohio” (386). That passage has nothing to do with buckeyes, nor did the previous passage have any leeway to the subject of deer. Yet, previous to this section, Sanders used a chunk of white space to show transition. I found his inconsistant transitions to be slightly confusing, but the story slowly pieced together.
I would have to agree with tcayer and Chris S. Fisher really did seem to make the run on sentences work in her essay. I just could really relate to it.
Sanders, I would have to agree with Patricia on how it was "like any old essay, very simple, no complexity whatsoever."
Fisher's essay seemed too short to get much of anything out of it. It's from a younger child's perspective so it's kind of fittingly written. The diction Fisher uses is one of a child's, and the syntax also contributes to the overall youthfulness of this essay. During this read I could feel myself thinking of family from a child's view again, especially the part where she was describing her desire to help in the kitchen.
Sanders' essay written with a bit more detail and a little bit of rambling. The essay grabbed my attention at the beginning but at the end I kind of zoned out of it. The sentences seemed to be too haggard and choppy, and kind of messed with the flow of the passage. He uses good diction to contribute to an illustrative piece, but sometimes it got to be too much.
One part that I wasn't sure of was in the second paragraph of Fisher's essay. The words "This" and "That" are capitalized, but for what reason? I can't think of anything important. Anybody else confused by this?
The composition of both pieces was really smooth. They both utilized transitions-- and even though Sander's bounced around on topics associated with his father (i.e. the deer, arthritis, woodwork), and I was with him all the way. Fisher used simple language, but it was able to evoke strong descriptions; I was able to taste what she described. Sanders used his descriptions well, and really left you with emotional imagery. It became very melancholy towards the end; but I felt it fitting.
I think that it was "This or That" because sometimes people say "I was busy with this and that," in spoken language-- but it doesn't read right in written language; so she had to capitalize for extra accentuation.
I never knew what Buckeyes were either until I read the end of Sander's essay. I'd had an idea but it was confirmed on the last page. I liked how Sander's kept returning to his father's hands. Everything was about his hands.
I liked Fisher's use of language. It makes women sound fierce. Especially when she writes about the canning not being for a man. It gave me the thought that a man wasn't strong enough to can food. It was fun.
Both had similar compositions. they started from an adult perspective, the conclusion known to the audience, than goes back to tell how the story got there. You know Fisher was going to get to eat some of the strawberry jam. You knew that there was a story behind his father's buckeyes and that was why he kept them.
they were different though. Fisher had a more quick sharp descriptive pattern, short sweet and to the point while Sanders had a longer more thoughtful descriptive pattern. He took his time to say what he meant and give details that gave more insight into him and his father's relationship.
1)I enjoyed the essay because of the choice of words that Fisher selected. She used rich vocabulary in order to portray the senses that she felt. It is hard to find authors using descriptive words for smell, but she did and I enjoyed reading things such as “opulent fragrance” and “tantalizing clouds”. I think that the process of making jam for Fisher was a sort of metaphor for the innocence and magic of youth because of the little comments that I mentioned earlier in which she adds her older voice to the story. At the end, one of the most important lines of the essay did this, “I loved it, then”. Also, in the second paragraph, I liked how she went on to describe the other duties of women in that time as housekeepers. I thought it was interesting how she made it seem like she hated this process when she was older, yet that was her career (cooking and dining arts) mentioned in the end note.
2) The author used many lists to reiterate certain things like characteristics of his father, which helped add humor to the essay. The descriptive writing was also very beautiful, Sanders was very thorough when describing each little detail, still making the story very readable. In the last paragraph, Sanders takes the idea of a buckeye seed and gives it a new meaning, he connects it to a separate memory of counting herds of deer. He then describes the eyes of the deer as “fathomless” in the very last phrase. I think that this connected to the idea that life and people are sometimes incomprehensible and how that is a beautiful thing to try and understand. I also liked the juxtaposition of this paragraph to the previous paragraph in which his father says, “It’s beautiful…but also poisonous. Nobody eats buckeyes, except maybe a fool squirrel”. This made the analogy with the deer even stronger.
Both of these essays are very short. "The Measure of My Powers" is full of very long and sometimes run on sentences. The whole third paragraph is actually one sentence. I felt like the author tended to jump around in the story and I got a little confused, and had to re-read some of it.
I really liked all of the dialogue in "Buckeye". I liked the use of the white space in the middle of the essay as well.
I thought both essays were written in a very simple form. There wasn't any jumps in the essays to confuse me or get me lost. I enjoyed both of them.
I do agree though with lanabannow when she says that Buckeye was choppy. I think that Saunders was trying to be descriptive and give us a visualization, but it didnt really fit in with the essay that well.
Sanders essay sucked me in right away because of the emotions Sanders brought forth in the first paragraph. You feel his loss and understand why he is so attached to the buckeyes. The dialogue is very minor, but it is enough to give me an idea of what his father was like. Although at the end it seems to be somewhat drawn out and got a little boring for me. But Sanders did do a great job paying close attention to every detail.
Fisher's essay was to short for me. I felt I needed more information, espically understanding the ending. Detail here were also very good and brought you right into the kitchen. Eric I agree with you about when reading this you have a child's view of life. It brought me back to being a child at home sitting in the kitchen baking with my mom. Fisher also had very long sentences, maybe that's why I got a little bored with it.
I really enjoyed both of theses essays. Reading them brought back some memories of my childhood which i had almost forgoten. The flow of both of the essays was well done because i didnt get lost at all and both essays kept me wanting more, which i think is a key point in any essay. You always want your readers to want to keep reading. The details in both of the essays was well done and they both painted a picture of what was going on. The composition wasnt very special, it was like any other essay.
Sanders essay was fairly short but it was well written and right to the point. It had just enough to give the reader a good perspective of how he felt and understand his memories of the "buckeye". I also never knew what a buckeye was either so it was interesting to find out what it was.
Fisher's essay was good too because it made you think about your memories while reading it. It was something that you could relate to in some ways. It kept me reading and interested.
18 comments:
I liked Ms.Fisher's essay because reading it brought memories from my childhood. The phrase "With us, for the first years of my life, there was a series, every summer of short, but violently active cannings. It was the same in my house. The essay by Mr.Sanders was sad but good. I liked it. I never knew what buckeyes was until reading this essay. i liked the flow and the way he shared the memories of his father.
I thought the composition of both essays was good I enjoyed both.
“The Measure of My Powers” There was a few different details that made this essay unique. The composition of the essay is very on-topic. I also thought it was interesting that more than one paragraph in her essay is just one huge run-on sentence. Most authors would lose their audience in huge run-ons, but she was able to make it work without confusing the essay too much.
“Buckeye” The composition of this essay was that of a very descriptive essay. I don’t see a lot of special differences from most generic essays, other than the richness of the descriptions. The entire essay was very clear and I was not confused at any point, which makes for a great essay.
Haha, I learned a few things while reading this essay (buckeyes, folk names for trees).
There was nothing all too special about the composition itself; once the story got started it was like any other essay. However I do enjoy the little preface. Though Sander’s content flattered me more than Fisher’s, I have to say his composition was close to that of Fisher’s. It felt like any old essay, very simple, no complexity whatsoever.
-Patricia
Fisher’s “The Measure of my Powers” is written with a four year old perspective. It’s simple and short, almost too short because when it was done I wanted to read more of her life and thoughts. She uses description but only when it was necessary. She doesn’t waste time trying to make her sentences fancy and drawn out. For example Fisher writes, “With us, for the first years of my life, there was a series, every summer, of short but violent active cannings” (296). From this sentence we understand that every summer they can fruit; simple. Yet, from the few words of description she uses we also realize that the canning sessions are quick and intense. I also appreciated her flow amongst paragraphs; it was not choppy even though the essay itself was short.
On the other hand, “Buckeye” was extremely choppy. For example, Sanders talks about Buckeyes being poisonous and how nobody was stupid enough to eat them. Following that Sanders says, “I knew the gaze of deer from living in the Ravenna Arsenal, in Portage County, up in the northeastern corner of Ohio” (386). That passage has nothing to do with buckeyes, nor did the previous passage have any leeway to the subject of deer. Yet, previous to this section, Sanders used a chunk of white space to show transition. I found his inconsistant transitions to be slightly confusing, but the story slowly pieced together.
I would have to agree with tcayer and Chris S. Fisher really did seem to make the run on sentences work in her essay. I just could really relate to it.
Sanders, I would have to agree with Patricia on how it was "like any old essay, very simple, no complexity whatsoever."
Fisher's essay seemed too short to get much of anything out of it. It's from a younger child's perspective so it's kind of fittingly written. The diction Fisher uses is one of a child's, and the syntax also contributes to the overall youthfulness of this essay. During this read I could feel myself thinking of family from a child's view again, especially the part where she was describing her desire to help in the kitchen.
Sanders' essay written with a bit more detail and a little bit of rambling. The essay grabbed my attention at the beginning but at the end I kind of zoned out of it. The sentences seemed to be too haggard and choppy, and kind of messed with the flow of the passage. He uses good diction to contribute to an illustrative piece, but sometimes it got to be too much.
One part that I wasn't sure of was in the second paragraph of Fisher's essay. The words "This" and "That" are capitalized, but for what reason? I can't think of anything important. Anybody else confused by this?
The composition of both pieces was really smooth. They both utilized transitions-- and even though Sander's bounced around on topics associated with his father (i.e. the deer, arthritis, woodwork), and I was with him all the way.
Fisher used simple language, but it was able to evoke strong descriptions; I was able to taste what she described.
Sanders used his descriptions well, and really left you with emotional imagery. It became very melancholy towards the end; but I felt it fitting.
I think that it was "This or That" because sometimes people say "I was busy with this and that," in spoken language-- but it doesn't read right in written language; so she had to capitalize for extra accentuation.
I never knew what Buckeyes were either until I read the end of Sander's essay. I'd had an idea but it was confirmed on the last page. I liked how Sander's kept returning to his father's hands. Everything was about his hands.
I liked Fisher's use of language. It makes women sound fierce. Especially when she writes about the canning not being for a man. It gave me the thought that a man wasn't strong enough to can food. It was fun.
Both had similar compositions. they started from an adult perspective, the conclusion known to the audience, than goes back to tell how the story got there. You know Fisher was going to get to eat some of the strawberry jam. You knew that there was a story behind his father's buckeyes and that was why he kept them.
they were different though. Fisher had a more quick sharp descriptive pattern, short sweet and to the point while Sanders had a longer more thoughtful descriptive pattern. He took his time to say what he meant and give details that gave more insight into him and his father's relationship.
1)I enjoyed the essay because of the choice of words that Fisher selected. She used rich vocabulary in order to portray the senses that she felt. It is hard to find authors using descriptive words for smell, but she did and I enjoyed reading things such as “opulent fragrance” and “tantalizing clouds”.
I think that the process of making jam for Fisher was a sort of metaphor for the innocence and magic of youth because of the little comments that I mentioned earlier in which she adds her older voice to the story. At the end, one of the most important lines of the essay did this, “I loved it, then”. Also, in the second paragraph, I liked how she went on to describe the other duties of women in that time as housekeepers. I thought it was interesting how she made it seem like she hated this process when she was older, yet that was her career (cooking and dining arts) mentioned in the end note.
2) The author used many lists to reiterate certain things like characteristics of his father, which helped add humor to the essay. The descriptive writing was also very beautiful, Sanders was very thorough when describing each little detail, still making the story very readable.
In the last paragraph, Sanders takes the idea of a buckeye seed and gives it a new meaning, he connects it to a separate memory of counting herds of deer. He then describes the eyes of the deer as “fathomless” in the very last phrase. I think that this connected to the idea that life and people are sometimes incomprehensible and how that is a beautiful thing to try and understand. I also liked the juxtaposition of this paragraph to the previous paragraph in which his father says, “It’s beautiful…but also poisonous. Nobody eats buckeyes, except maybe a fool squirrel”. This made the analogy with the deer even stronger.
Both of these essays are very short. "The Measure of My Powers" is full of very long and sometimes run on sentences. The whole third paragraph is actually one sentence. I felt like the author tended to jump around in the story and I got a little confused, and had to re-read some of it.
I really liked all of the dialogue in "Buckeye". I liked the use of the white space in the middle of the essay as well.
I thought both essays were written in a very simple form. There wasn't any jumps in the essays to confuse me or get me lost. I enjoyed both of them.
I do agree though with lanabannow when she says that Buckeye was choppy. I think that Saunders was trying to be descriptive and give us a visualization, but it didnt really fit in with the essay that well.
Sanders essay sucked me in right away because of the emotions Sanders brought forth in the first paragraph. You feel his loss and understand why he is so attached to the buckeyes. The dialogue is very minor, but it is enough to give me an idea of what his father was like. Although at the end it seems to be somewhat drawn out and got a little boring for me. But Sanders did do a great job paying close attention to every detail.
Fisher's essay was to short for me. I felt I needed more information, espically understanding the ending. Detail here were also very good and brought you right into the kitchen. Eric I agree with you about when reading this you have a child's view of life. It brought me back to being a child at home sitting in the kitchen baking with my mom. Fisher also had very long sentences, maybe that's why I got a little bored with it.
I really enjoyed both of theses essays. Reading them brought back some memories of my childhood which i had almost forgoten. The flow of both of the essays was well done because i didnt get lost at all and both essays kept me wanting more, which i think is a key point in any essay. You always want your readers to want to keep reading. The details in both of the essays was well done and they both painted a picture of what was going on. The composition wasnt very special, it was like any other essay.
Sanders essay was fairly short but it was well written and right to the point. It had just enough to give the reader a good perspective of how he felt and understand his memories of the "buckeye". I also never knew what a buckeye was either so it was interesting to find out what it was.
Fisher's essay was good too because it made you think about your memories while reading it. It was something that you could relate to in some ways. It kept me reading and interested.
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